Impossible. That is a word I have wrestled with a lot here lately. Impossible that my little baby is here too early. Impossible that this is our new life. Our new routine. We have also heard it from drs. When we asked when Mason could move back to Women's. It is impossible. That was our answer. We are not happy with it but it was our answer nevertheless. Today God spoke to both Josh and I using that word. I would say more than speak, He shouted at us to remind us of His faithfulness. I received a devotion forwarded to me (from Proverbs 31 ministry) from a dear friend and Josh received the same one forwarded to him from his boss. Here is the message God had for us:
This is the news. He is the truth. What the drs give us on a daily basis is just the news but God is the truth and He only knows the truth. We have access to truth that transcends the news. What is impossible for man's limitations is always possible with our limitless God. She goes on to say that she likes to think of the word impossible in a new way. We now think of it as I'm possible because our God is the great I AM.
This is news.
And This is the Truth:
I AM THE WAY AND THE TRUTH AND THE LIFE.
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." John 14:6
I AM FOREVER FAITHFUL.
"He is the Maker of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them-He remains faithful forever." Psalm 146:6
I AM WITH YOU.
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
I AM HOLDING YOU.
"Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand." Psalm 73:23
I AM YOUR HIDING PLACE.
"You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance." Psalm 32:7
Oh how thankful I am that God is with us on every step of this journey and how he continuously reminds us that He is here. I don't know how I would be making it through this without Him.
Today has been a rough day. I think they finally have the position right on his vent. They finally put in a wheel (like he had at women's) to help with this. I sure wish the 2 medical facilities would converse with one another but they certainly seem reluctant to do that here. Mason's blood pressure has been dropping today and he has has some bad blood gases. Whenever they would change the pressure his gases would improve but his blood pressure would drop. We were stuck in this cycle today with giving him a bolus of fluids and waiting and no good and now we are back on some BP medicine and have seen improvements. Thank you for your continued prayers. This is a journey I trying to give thanks through, even though it is hard.
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Oh sweet Lauren... What an incredible mommy you are! Not only are you faithful to your family and your fragile child, but you are forever faithful to God and the plan He has for you and your family. I can only imagine how emotionaly exhausting this battle has been this far, but daily you and Josh put on a smile and keep riding this "roller coaster." Know that you are loved, prayed for, and thought about often. Miss you guys tremendously!!!!
ReplyDeleteLauren and Josh,
ReplyDeleteWe are keeping baby Mason and his sweet family in our hearts and prayers. I know it has been an incredibly emotional and exhausting few days. Hope you get some rest tonight and see some improvement tomorrow. We do miss you all so!
Please know that your sweet family has been in my prayers since Anna Block first posted about the birth of Mason. I know that every day seems like 4 steps forward, 3 steps back, but as you posted today that God knows and with Him nothing is impossible....I would love to bring dinner to the hospital one night for you, when you get a minute you can check me out with Tim and Anna and send me an email....Beth Hutchens BLHutchens@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteLauren,
ReplyDeleteWe have never met but I heard about your story from a mutual friend. I have been following your blog updates and keeping your family in my prayers. You are such a strong woman and an inspiration to me to stay positive and faithful to God. Thank you for sharing your story and I will continue to pray for you.